A Peaceful Heart, with LaShawn Williams
In our fourth video of "Where Peace Begins", Dr. LaShawn Williams shares what it means to see others how god sees them even in the middle of conflict and separation.
"He begs you to not merely ungird your sword, but to ungird your heart.”
- James Ferrell, The Peacegiver
When going through her divorce, Dr. LaShawn Williams once leaned her head against the wall and imagined she was leaning her head on the shoulder of Jesus. She prayed for a heart at peace.
Conflict often makes us feel helpless, unsure of ourselves and unsure of the future. In this video, “A Peaceful Heart,” LaShawn shares about opening her heart when her life situation felt beyond her control. She found deep wisdom in The Peacegiver by James Ferrell, who used the language “ungird your heart.” Ungirding usually refers to relinquishing our weapons. When we ungird our hearts, LaShawn explains, we find that we don’t need the violence that we thought we needed.
With a heart at peace,
“You see [the other person]; their fullness, their potential, their dignity, their humanity. You see them from a lens of love. And you know that its not just you. You realize its you seeing in a godly way. Maybe its once, maybe its more than once — but if you can get that one time to see as god sees, it never leaves you; it changes you.”
Putting ideas into action
After watching LaShawn’s video, think of a conflict you are having in your life. Use the following exercise to consider how you can obtain a heart at peace.
Go to the mountaintop. Our view of others tends to get mired in the mud of anger and justification when we are wrestling with conflict. Find a place, metaphorically, that lets you rise above all of that. It could be a piece of music, a sunrise or sunset, exercise, or a holy place that elevates your thinking and heightens your senses.
Ask yourself how a loving God, loving parents, or a loving friend might see the person you are in conflict with. Can you, for just a moment, see the person you are in conflict through that new lens?
Ask yourself, how can the faith I have in myself or in God be extended to them? How can my faith connect to their faith in a way that allows us to collaboratively solve our problems together?
Take the first step. Be proactive. Exercise faith in the possibility of reconciliation by reaching out to them in faith and love, not knowing what will come next.
Dr. LaShawn C. Williams is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Relational Change Strategist focusing on the interactions between people and across differences where connection matters most. Her anti-oppression work centers on the effects of marginalization, isolation, and disconnection in personal and professional spaces. She specializes in interpersonal and organizational change from the margins to the center. Grounded in Relational Cultural Theory, Dr. Williams works with leaders at every organizational level to help them engage the taboo concepts of interpersonal shame and humiliation then commuting to create pathways toward mutual empathy and empowerment. She is an accessible consultant to local, regional, and national organizations. She is passionate about Relational Transformation and eagerly supports individuals, couples, families and groups through her practice, Relational Spaces at The Utah Center for Connection in Orem.
Beautifully articulated piece here! Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and orientation of openness within conflict.
Dr. Williams is an incredible teacher and a wise leader. I am so grateful for this message. Thank you.